Aug 9, 2021Member-onlyThe Gift of Love — Or, How a Dildo Wound Up on Our Front LawnEarlier today, I was out picking up bits of trash that blow into our front yard. Except for the last two weeks, which have been insanely hot, I actually spend a lot of time watering the trees and cleaning up our front yard, even though we have gardeners come every…Dildo3 min read
Jan 11, 2021Member-onlyI Fart Like My MotherWhen I was a teenager, I swore with clenched fists on the albums of heavy metal musicians that I would never, ever be like my parents. I then spent my life distancing myself from their sympathy for Richard Nixon and love of Velveeta. I especially tried to grow away from…Farts4 min read
Oct 23, 2019Sister, Redacted: The Other True Story10/23/1989 I’m 22 years old. I live in South Sacramento with a roommate. I left school a year ago and moved out of the family home because of my father’s violence. You, my little sister, helped me pack, and swore at Dad on my behalf, calling him an “asshole.” I…Family11 min read
Sep 26, 2018The Future I Wish I Hadn’t PredictedIt’s really that bad. On February 16, 1993, I wrote an article for my friend’s fanzine, The Legions of Rassilon Quarterly, about “Internet.” (Here’s a link to the PDF of the original article so that you can see it’s real.) We called it “Internet” rather than “the Internet” back then. It basically consisted of…Internet7 min read
Jul 6, 2018The Greatest Story Ever Interacted WithThis paper originally appeared in The WyrdCon Companion Book published December 2012, edited by Sarah Lynne Bowman, Ph.D. and Aaron Vanek. A great story reaches into us and takes root in our souls. It captures our devotion and imagination, our conversation and company. Those who are truly inspired by the…Christianity21 min read
May 9, 2018“Goodnight, Marvin”My In Memorium to Douglas Adams as published in April 2005 by Benbella Books as part of the Anthology at the End of the Universe: Leading Science Fiction Authors On Douglas Adams’ The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy (Smart Pop series), edited by Glenn Yeffeth. May 12, 2001 This is…Science Fiction4 min read
Mar 4, 2015Dogma, Darth Vader and My Sexual AwakeningAs it originally appeared in Issue Five, Spring 2009 make/shift magazine When I was six, my parents converted from the Greek Orthodox church to Judaism. They’d heard the church was giving money to transsexuals. Or was it terrorists? My father was Greek. My mother was Scottish. They converted as if…Darth Vader6 min read
Jan 3, 2015Sister, Interrupted: A True Story10/23/1989 You’re 17 years old. You wake up Monday morning at a friend’s house. She lives on a winding mountain road somewhere in Shingle Springs, California. It’s one of those teacher meeting days. No school today. A senior in high school, a member of student council, a cheerleader, a model…8 min read
